This has been happening for several years and I legally owe between $9,000 and $10,000 in back pay. Although the owners made everything legit, they made no mention of paying me that money owed.
The other employees do not know that they are also owed money. I spoke with a lawyer and even though by law I am owed the money, I will have to take the matter to court or try to settle.
I’m so torn. I feel betrayed by my boss/friend but somehow compelled to tell my colleagues about it. We also owe them money. I’m not even sure I can stay friends or work for this company anymore.
I caught them lying to other employees. Should I ask my bosses/friends for money? Should I notify other employees?
Bad: You should pursue back wages owed to you, following the advice of your lawyer (a letter from the lawyer could inspire business owners to avoid court and offer you a fair settlement).
You should assume your friendship is over and proactively seek a position at another company, in case you decide to part ways.
As for notifying other employees, your attorney’s letter to spa owners might include a sentence strongly suggesting that they take action to reinstate the back wages of all of their employees. Your attorney might decide to reach out to the other employees independently, rounding up a few extra clients and billable hours along the way.
Business owners should assume that all employees will know this. The spa’s own attorney will advise them on how to settle, manage penalties, and continue to stay in business, legitimately.
dear Amy: Fifty-two years ago, my sister confided a secret to me on the condition that I tell no one.
She has five children, two with her first husband and three children with three different men (conceived while still married to her first husband).
I feel guilty for holding this secret and feel that my adult nieces and nephews have a basic right to know their truth. Her fear of being disowned by her children once they know the truth shuts her up. Plus, she sees no reason to upset so many families.
Is this his secret to hide from his five adult children? The letters I read in your column clearly indicate that eventually, with the prevalence of DNA testing, it is only a matter of time before this is revealed.
Is it my secret to tell? Your thoughts?
Not: Knowing a secret does not make it “yours”. So this secret is not yours to share.
Yes, your sister’s adult children have a right to know their DNA heritage. Your sister is the person who should tell them. She can either say it herself and hope to control the narrative, or wait for the inevitable DNA search to reveal the truth.
Keep in mind that if ANY of the three affected siblings (or their children) register on a DNA site, they could connect with other DNA relatives there (unknown half-siblings or their children, for example) and could begin the process of untangling this very tangled web.
You might be helpful to your sister if you offer to talk it over with her and assure her that you will provide her with ongoing emotional support.
dear Amy: “To say or not to saywondered if she should tell her future husband about her history of sexual abuse. I didn’t work on my abuse story until after my abuser died, several years after I got married, and after the birth of my child.
I finally worked up the courage to tell my husband by writing a letter describing what had happened. His answer ? “I always knew there was something wrong with you.”
I was stunned. He never said anything positive. It was the beginning of the end of our marriage.
If I had known he would have thought I was “flawed”, I probably never would have married him.
Learned: I am really sorry. Thank you for offering your point of view.
©2022 by Amy Dickinson distributed by Tribune Content Agency
