I saw this as extremely rude. First of all, I was offended that the owner didn’t take me at my word. And even if she wanted to verify my claim, she could have done so easily (and out of earshot) by calling the store herself.
Although I was ready to buy from the most expensive store, I changed my mind. I told my salesperson that I didn’t like being told I might be lying.
My husband says my answer was “harsh”. Was I too sensitive, and wrong to be offended?
Yes because, Miss Manners assures you that your honor was not at stake. This was a professional transaction and it was legitimate for the store to ask you for proof.
We have all made a societal agreement that trading and advertising are subject to a looser standard of truth in business. Otherwise, we’d all be calling a certain chicken restaurant a liar if we didn’t always lick our fingers after eating there.
Dear Miss Manners: I am a disabled Veteran and also receive Social Security Disability Assistance. I am not employed due to the difficulties of my disability.
When I meet new people, I inevitably get the “Where do you work?” ” question. I often say no, that I’m taking a break or that I’m retired.
My dilemma is that I wish to be honest; however, I respect my privacy and do not wish to discuss my disabilities. Is it appropriate to just tell people I’m retired? I look like a healthy person not yet of retirement age, but I have serious mental health issues. Worrying about how to answer people’s endless questions only makes me more anxious.
” I am retired veteran.” At that point, their reflex will kick in to thank you for your service and – Miss Manners hopes – show some sensitivity by not pushing any further.
Dear Miss Manners: Is there an appropriate, or at least not insulting, way to ask about a man’s cologne?
There’s a new recruit in our office who’s about my husband’s age. He wears the best smelling cologne, and I would like to buy some for my husband for his birthday. How can I ask her name without sounding flirtatious or arrogant?
“I think my husband would like your cologne. Do you mind if I ask his name? »
New Miss Manners columns are published Monday to Saturday at washingtonpost.com/board. You can send questions to Miss Manners on her website, missmanners.com. You can also follow her @RealMissManners.
