I think a little reciprocity is in order. People can always provide doggy bags if they’re worried they’ll have a piece of fried chicken left.
Let’s not add fuel to a fire already too well fanned.
Miss Manners realizes that not everyone with special dietary needs is polite enough not to draw attention to themselves at the table. But that problem won’t be solved by asking hosts – who may be vegetarians for religious or health reasons that would be a serious impediment to what you offer – to serve meat.
You add vegetarian options to make sure people have something to eat, not to make endless choices available.
Dear Miss Manners: I’m married and I have a wonderful family, but deep down I wonder if my mother is hiding something from me.
Years ago, I came home late from shopping for my mom, and overheard her talking with my brother. Notice, I wasn’t trying to listen, but they were loud, and I heard the end of the conversation. The words I heard from my brother were, “If my sister ever finds out, say this.”
I still wonder today what they are hiding from me. Maybe I was adopted, or maybe it’s something else they’d rather not talk about. Every time I try to confront them, they look at me like they don’t know what I’m talking about. What should I do?
had the conversation happened yesterday, Miss Manners might share your suspicions about their inability to remember the subject. But years later?
Probably, they really forgot – just like you. If that’s not possible, at least consider that a secret you don’t know can be good or bad: maybe they were discussing your surprise birthday party.
Dear Miss Manners: I have a friend who, invited to dinner at my house, fills her plate but does not eat everything on it. Being sick and tired of seeing my hard work and expensive groceries end up in the trash, is there a polite way to ask her to take it easy and then have a few seconds if she’s still hungry?
No, but there is a solution to your problem, which has the additional advantage of being more formal and suitable: Fill your guests’ plates yourself.
New Miss Manners columns are published Monday to Saturday at washingtonpost.com/board. You can send questions to Miss Manners on her website, missmanners.com. You can also follow her @RealMissManners.