Dear Carolyn: Several months ago my wife informed me that she wanted to hire a housekeeper, saying she was tired of the mess, tired of feeling overworked and tired of fighting with me over the division of labor . A week later, a cleaning lady arrived at our house. I find it incredibly stressful. I’m concerned that the maids are not paying attention to our things, that they take a peek at our private documents, and that overall this is a ridiculous expense ($ 300 per month!) On whatever she wanted to spend all of her annual raise. When the maids leave, I’m fried, but I admit that my wife seems much happier. I still wish she could relax and lower her standards a bit, but… am I the one to get over this?