Kerry Katona broke down in tears on Loose Women on Tuesday as she detailed her abusive marriage to her late ex-husband George Kay.
Admitting she felt shame at being with him for so long, Kerry, 42, said she was sorry her children knew about the abuse.
Kerry was married to her third husband, George, from September 2014 until 2019, when he broke down and died after a seizure at a hotel in Sutton Weaver, Cheshire.
Emotional: Kerry Katona broke down in tears on Loose Women on Tuesday as she detailed her abusive marriage to late ex-husband George Kay
The TV personality said her mother, Sue, also knew about the abuse in the relationship because she saw the bruises George gave her.
Kerry said: ‘IIt’s not about blame, it’s about fear. It’s so hard, my mom said she was waiting for the police to knock on the door and say he killed me.
“I have George’s baby girl, I remember him covering up my bruises and I told my mum it was from rough sex. She looked at George and he knew she knew.
Kerry said her eldest daughter Molly gave her a look one day that worried her about what she was teaching her children by staying with George.
Couple: Kerry was married to her third husband George from September 2014 until 2019, when he collapsed and died after a seizure at a hotel in Sutton Weaver, Cheshire (pictured in 2015)
The former Atomic Kitten star is mother to daughters Molly, 21, and Lily-Sue, 19, with ex Brian McFadden, son Maxwell, 14, with ex Mark Croft and daughter Dylan-Jorge’ DJ’, eight years old, with George.
She said: “Molly gave me a look of pure weakness once and I thought what the hell I was teaching my kids.” It’s such a shame that I lasted so long, I know my kids are messed up because of it.
‘Lilly and Molly can go see Brian and the same with Mark, whenever they want, but DJ doesn’t have that choice.’
Kerry writes about her abusive relationship with George in her new book Kerry Katona: Whole Again and said her older daughters have “heard a lot”.
Discussing the book, she said, “I’m only 42, but I packed a lot. The first book was more about my childhood, being in foster care, the second was bankruptcy, damn it, we could be here all day.
Candid: Admitting she’s ashamed to have stayed with him for so long, Kerry said she regrets her children knew about the abuse
Kerry said: ‘I don’t blame it, it’s a scare. It’s so hard, my mum said she was waiting for the police to knock on the door and say he killed me’
“What a lot of people don’t understand, I ended up in foster care because my mom’s guy beat her up and I said I would never do it. I ended up doing this to my children and it worries me now, I panic. He still has a hold on me.
“I remember coming on the show and me and Brian…sorry George had just split up and you asked me if I was wearing my wedding ring but no one knew what would happen. George’s fear was that bad.
Lilly and Molly were coming home from school and I was telling them to come upstairs because of George. They never saw anything but they heard a lot.
Kerry recently reunited with her ex Brian when they both celebrated Molly’s 21st birthday in Ireland.
Heartbreaking: Kerry said her eldest daughter Molly gave her a look one day that worried her about what she was teaching her children by staying with George (pictured in 2015)
She said: ‘It was Molly’s 21st and we had a big birthday party in Ireland and Brian was there but Molly and Lily can’t remember we were together.
“With his fiancée Danielle, he has definitely changed for the better. My kids tell me how the new missus is and they love Danielle. We had a good old dance and song, it was nostalgic.
Kerry also discussed her romance with her fiancé Ryan Mahoney, whom she met five years ago on the dating app Bumble.
She said: ‘Oh Ryan, that one I can’t follow, I have to google it half the time. He’s definitely a keeper, he was a slow burner but he rocked my world.
She said: “Molly gave me a look of pure weakness once and I thought what the hell I was teaching my kids.” There’s so much shame I’ve held on for so long, I know my kids are messed up because of it’
Honest: Kerry writes about her abusive relationship with George in her new book Kerry Katona: Whole Again and said her older daughters ‘heard a lot’
Kerry added that she has no plans to carry any more children, but would consider having a surrogate in the future if Ryan wants to have children of her own.
She said: “My other half is eight years younger than me and has no children, me and the children are enough for him, so I don’t want to deprive him of that option.”
“There may be no eggs left anyway. I will never carry a child again because I almost died with DJ but having the ability to have a surrogate…that’s it.
Wedding bells! Kerry is now engaged to her fiancé Ryan Mahoney