For me personally I would like to be crystal clear with all the other carpool parents that you think it is not safe and that your daughter is not allowed in her car for the moment – use some recent specific examples of her aggressive driving, and say that YOU would rather your daughter did not get into a car driven by the father. (Don’t say your daughter asked, she can fade into the background while you endorse the opinion yourself.) If her daughter has another parent, maybe they can drive, or you can. can have two drivers for the three children. (In that case, maybe the aggressive driver’s daughter could be picked up from the driver of the day by one of her parents, so you don’t get out of your way.) But I wouldn’t just pick the day. of her aggressive father without another glance, everyone is way too smart (daughters included) for this to fly – everyone will understand the role model, but maybe not the reason, so you might as well talk about it.