The woman glared at her, wiped the front of her shirt as if my daughter had spilled something on her (my daughter wasn’t holding anything) and huffed, but said nothing. She then walked over to a companion and said out loud how “this young lady tried to run over me”. They both stared at her until we could finish our order and leave.
Was there anything else my daughter or I should have done? I believe my daughter handled the situation appropriately, and I told her. However, she was quite upset by the treatment this woman had given her and feared that her action was somehow more terrible than the little accident it was.
The mama bear in me meant something to the woman, but I also strongly believe in not being rude just because someone else is.
Lessons for your girl to learn are the ones you are already teaching her: that not everyone is polite, but that you don’t return rudeness with more rudeness. You can tell her that Miss Manners knows she handled the situation well – and that everyone within earshot was on her side.
Dear Miss Manners: Is there a new way to time weddings and receptions? I’ve been invited to several weddings where the ceremony is at 2 p.m., but the reception is at 5 p.m., leaving three hours apart.
The ceremonies only last about 30 minutes and the reception venues are not far (maybe 20 minutes). What are the guests supposed to do during this long interval? Also, many of these weddings state that “black tie is optional,” so are we supposed to stay in our fancy clothes until the reception, or go home and change?
In the past, the reception took place right after the ceremony. Am I old fashioned? Is this a new trend?
What trend are you think about? Deciding that the rooms (which were only available at 2 and 5 p.m.) are more important than the guests? Summoning friends and family at the whim of the wedding photographer while everyone else is standing there? Hosting a black tie event before the sun goes down?
No, none of these trends are new – nor do they meet the requirement for hosts to consider the convenience of their guests.
New Miss Manners columns are published Monday to Saturday at washingtonpost.com/board. You can send questions to Miss Manners on her website, missmanners.com. You can also follow her @RealMissManners.
