I promise that when a cashier politely asks a customer to follow the rules, or re-checks that an order is correct before debiting the customer’s card, it is done from a place of compassion.
Being kind to others is not a political position. And spitting on a waitress, hostess, cashier, or service clerk won’t change anything except your ability to return to the establishment in the future.
Even occasional rudeness serving people during normal hours is despicable. What you are describing is horrific proof that there are people among us who are outside the realm of civilization.
Dear Miss Manners: In a conversation with my mom yesterday – she’s in my early 80s and I’m in my early 60s – we were discussing a wedding invitation my brother and his wife received. She said she deduced from this that my brother’s adult son, who lives with his parents, was not invited to the wedding. She told me that the envelope was addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Joe Blow and did not include “and his family”.
This part is not the problem. I was horrified that my sister-in-law didn’t deserve the use of her own first name.
My mother accepts changing times very well. By her words, her ideas and her voice, you would never guess her age, but I was very surprised that she still thought it was appropriate.
I have been married for 30 years and have kept my own last name. Naturally, some people assume that I have my husband’s last name, but if I was addressed as if I didn’t have my own first name, I would find that extremely shocking. As far as I remember, that never happened.
My mom insisted (surprisingly for her) that it’s always “how we do it”. Can you ask us if this outdated form of address is still appropriate? We have elected you as arbitrator.
Both forms are “finished”; we allow a choice. Stupidly, Miss Manners realizes, because then people like you decide that not using the form you prefer is an insult.
Dear Miss Manners: My best friend recently divorced. Mutual friends have asked me why they broke up. What’s a polite way of saying it’s personal and going about their own business?
“I wouldn’t dream to ask him.