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Messages from the archives of Rutherford Hall, critical communications strategist
WhatsApp to Stephen: Oh my God, don’t get me started on that Apple video. They asked Octavia Spencer to play the role of Mother Nature and ask them about the good job they’re doing by going green. A morality that makes you vomit. It was so nauseating that I wanted to buy an oil rig. BTW Did you hear that BP is rebranding as Beyond Pickups again?
WhatsApp to Stephen: Mind you, this is causing a lot of buzz on social media, which is handy because it looks like they’re about to get strangled in China. And new product launches weren’t all that. But everyone talks about Mother Nature. Food for thought.
WhatsApp to Murray@BP: Murray. Have you seen this fantastic Apple Mother Nature video. They released a lot of products, but all anyone talks about is that they stopped using leather in watch straps. I know “be more Apple” is never useful advice, but there’s something there, if you’re looking to move the news cycle forward.
WhatsApp to Murray@BP: Certainly not. I would never make BP jokes at a time like this. Anyway, it’s fair enough if you think the video isn’t for you. I think it would help, but I see you’re not yet able to change your focus.
WhatsApp to SusanCB: Hi Susan, I have an idea. I think this could be perfect for Volpone Bank. I will send details by email. PS: Have you heard about this amazing company? It’s a sort of Tinder for senior executives. It’s called BP.
From [email protected]
So I’ve been thinking about how to shift the story in relation to the upcoming tricky quarters as well as your continued desire to soften Volpone’s image a bit. Have you seen this inspiring video from Apple, where they welcome Mother Nature into the boardroom to update her on their efforts to become carbon neutral? I’m not easy to move, but this gave me a lump in my throat.
And that’s all social media influencers have been talking about Apple for days. This could become a meme and so, without wanting to put too fine a point on it, I think we should build on this idea and put it into practice. I know the tide is going out a little on ESG but the waves are still breaking on the beach. Why not use it to announce Volpone’s new commitment to becoming Britain’s greenest bank by 2030.
Best, Rutherford
Find me on Strava, KoM Sydenham Hill, PR London to Brighton 3h 17m
From [email protected]
No, I have no idea what being Britain’s greenest bank means either, but it sounds great and will help the brand. I’m sure your guys can come up with some measures, the dubious one on reducing carbon intensity that others are using seems very popular.
Anyway, we’re reworking the idea of Mother Nature, except we call ours Mother Earth or Gaia or something, and instead of her coming to the meeting room, she comes to the ticket office from a Volpone cashier at a Main Street branch (you still have a few). branches, right?) because she is looking for the greenest bank in Britain to open an account.
I don’t think we could find an Oscar-winning actress, but we could definitely get Holly Willoughby or Maya Jama from love island. Different staff members come and tell him everything you are doing to save the planet. You might even want to be in it yourself in the end, although CEOs are usually more convincing when played by actors. Tim Cook had about as much charisma as John Major’s avatar.
It is important to never forget that we are also talking to shareholders. They want to know that our results remain the same. Our slogan is therefore: “For us, the color of money is green”.
The other thing we can relate to is executive bonuses. This could allow you to change the bonus structure, so that your ESG component is increased to 20%. I know ESG-related bonuses are criticized by institutional shareholders, but Part E is still acceptable and if you get the metric right, it’s the easiest money ever made. I achieved my goal by installing a bike rack outside the office. Best, R.
Find me on Strava. . .
From [email protected]
I admit we thought Mother Nature’s roles were feminine, but of course I can ask about Idris Elba as you wish.
Thanks for the political ideas. Loving the commitment to green investing and decarbonizing your back offices, sounds great. But I’m not sure the “we’re removing leather seats from all our private jets” principle works across the board. Best, R.
Find me on Strava. . .