My sister-in-law received a vaccine but refused the second dose.
Now she plans to come here to visit a friend who lives near us.
She wants to spend a day with my wife and sleep with us.
My wife and I have been vaccinated, as has our son.
She will fly here and will not be able to quarantine herself as she will only be there for a few days.
The fact that she is not fully vaccinated really bothers me. Are we in danger?
– Worried brother-in-law
Worried brother-in-law: This is a question you should ask your own doctor or do your best to follow the (constantly evolving) guidelines issued by the CDC (cdc.gov).
If I were in your identical situation with a fully immunized household, I wouldn’t worry about a brief visit from someone not fully immunized, but you and your wife MUST make this choice based on your own comfort level. and guidelines in your state.
Your half-vaccinated sister-in-law could eventually pass the virus on to unvaccinated people, but even if you have caught the virus, your vaccination is supposed to protect you from the most serious form of the disease. This is the advantage of vaccination!
Is your sister-in-law considering ignoring all the travel guidelines that should apply to her? Viral variants apparently affecting younger, healthier people could cause additional spikes.
Your sister-in-law claims to have already contracted coronavirus, and that could be her justification for not being fully vaccinated, but I would be skeptical about that. You need to understand that for whatever reason, she might be taking a greater risk for her own health (and the health of others) than you are willing to take for yours.
One way to deal with this might be for you and your family members to welcome a visit with her, away and from a distance, but refuse to allow her to spend the night with you.
Dear Amy: A little over a year and a half ago, my mother fell ill, spent two weeks in intensive care, another week in the hospital, and then went to a rehabilitation center.
Meanwhile, her brother (who never married and has no children) had to undergo open heart surgery.
My husband and I had full responsibility for taking care of them, in addition to looking after our own young children.
I called my first cousin to let her know that my mother and my great-uncle (her aunt and her great-uncle) were in the hospital.
His deceased father was their older brother and they had been very good at watching his parents and helping them before they died.
My cousin never called back to see my mother or our uncle.
I was really shocked at his lack of concern for their well-being.
Then this week, I got an invitation to her daughter’s wedding.
I’m flabbergasted that she has the audacity to send an invitation to a family she obviously cares so little about.
What is the appropriate response to this situation?
– First cousin frustrated
Frustrated first cousin: My feeling is that your cousin has not linked the two events (these illnesses and the wedding invitation) that are so important to you.
Please be honest with her! Contact her saying, “Mum and Great Uncle Joe seem to be recovering from their health emergencies. I have to be honest with you; it was a very difficult time. Why haven’t you been in contact before now? “
Dear Amy: Like so many others, I discovered a half-sister after a parent did her DNA profile.
We met and she is very nice.
I was 9 years old when my mother took a six month “business trip”.
I still remember that time. The abandoned and fearful feelings were swept away by the family members I lived with. I am 66 years old and these feelings persist to this day.
Be careful with these tests. It changed the way I saw myself and my family.
Was there: I am highlighting these DNA discovery stories so that readers can see the variety of experiences people have when faced with this news.
2021 by Amy Dickinson distributed by Tribune Content Agency